|
Know why the blade's triangular?
|
|
|
| Re-Epiphanized<--make that two words looked up in the dictionary |
[Mar. 8th, 2007|12:40 am] |
A lot has happened to me this past year and its been hard getting back in the swing of...well, life things. Today I realized that I used to utilize this journal for the documentation of such, in a form of twisted personal therapy, venting, basking in the glow of love, party planning and documentation, narratives on moving, and gaurded half-truths to create the illusion of a life in proccess. I don't know how many of my LJ friends even check it anymore, but I am hoping not many. Why? Because I want to write in my journal again without feeling completely exposed to my friends. So why not just do private entries? I might and most likely will...but sometimes its relieving to feel like I let something out into the world, regardless of who is reading it, I know its out there and that I am not hiding it. Its not that anything I will write will be groundbreaking to my friends, but well, now I am just talking about nothing so I am moving on.
So why write journals now?
1. To organize my thoughts, my plans, my goals just like so
2. To talk, when I feel like I have no one to talk to, or when I just don't want to talk that much about myself to someone
3. To feel better
4. To inspire? me...its been awhile since I've seen or heard that word, feels awkward using it
5. To gain rapport with others, meet new people, rekindle old friendships
At first, I might post a lot, cause my thoughts are scattered and vast. I'm sorry if I am on your friends page and become a nuisance<--the only word I looked up the proper spelling of. See, I am not completely un-apologetic...and not completely grammatically lazy. For the record, my flow of writing is based on how I hear it in my head as verbal story telling, sometimes screenplay like. (I think this is why I like the style of Dave Eggars) The puncuation errors are me being stupid and the spelling errors are out of pure laziness of thought and lack of effort to reference the dictionary. Like right now, I remember typing a word in this paragraph and thinking -that can't possibly be spelt right- but moved on and now forgot which word it was and am in no mood to read back through to find it...actually, I think I threw out the word I attempted anyway in lue of a word I could actually spell. Maybe not. Well this journal thing is going swell so far, eh? |
|
|
| One of my strengths is the way I deal with the results of my weaknesses. |
[May. 11th, 2006|11:05 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | Largeman, this is Dana | ] |
I am flighty and hard headed. When I start to lose respect for someone, if I feel if it is deserved and repeatedly proven to be more than my perceptions at play, it doesn't return easily. If I decide that something isn't going to work out, no matter how many times the wheel turns, I will bring it back to that decision. Being apathetically strong, or as Eric says, a robot, I take flight and feel completely confident about it.
Yesterday I felt the baby kick for the first time. It felt like bubbles rolling along my inner abdomen. The baby is due September 19th and his name will be Anthony Amzie.
I am watching movies I have seen a dozen times, and I can't even find my High Fidelity VHS. I should buy the DVD already. Last night I decided Duckie is cutie than Blaine and right now I am loving the music in Garden State. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind was a little painful, so I only got half way through. I need more movies, the netflix don't come fast enough. |
|
|
| Frustration |
[Apr. 12th, 2006|05:20 pm] |
Why am I a horrible job candidate?
I don't understand. I don't even get called on my resume.
I hate this.
Anyone know of anywhere hiring? |
|
|
| This is an update |
[Apr. 11th, 2006|10:14 am] |
So the baby is a Boy. It will be checked again April 19th, but this guy could find the babies kidneys with the Ultrasound, so I am pretty sure he could find a penis.
After talking with Matt and my dad, we have narrowed the name down to _______ Amzie Panepento. We have no first name picked out. The two we kind of liked are now in the top 10 of most popular boy names for 2005: Ethan and Noah. Well, crap. So we are on a search. Suggest away, just don't be pushy and don't get insulted when we don't like your suggestion. It's all part of the process. Other names we are weighing: Liam and Nico...Nico and Panepento both end in O which is weird to me, but not Matt. Liam is in the top 40 popular I think. I want something unique enough to have him not end up being ____ P. in class, or "Is there anything else we can call you, since there are three other ______s in the class?" But I don't want something as weird as Amzie...cause he already has that for a middle name, and if we wanted to go that weird, it would be the first name. My dad, named Amzie, warned against it as a first name as well.
We will make the registry soon, and the baby shower (not yet determined to be all female or co) will be some Saturday in early July. |
|
|
| More...really, more pointless than the last |
[Apr. 5th, 2006|11:46 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | avoiding my shower | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Men Women Children, and I dont know what I think of it yet | ] |
1. The Last Supper, is the reason I love to throw dinner parties. I watched it for the first time when I was 18, and it changed me forever and I just now realized it.
2. I have 2 bachelors degrees and I get paid $11.78 an hour. Something is wrong here.
3. I can only drink orange juice with lots of pulp left in it. I haaaate strained OJ.
4. Fajitas is my new favorite restaurant.
5. The baby furniture is black. I want a goth baby.
6. I haven't dyed my hair in 5 months, and I can't for 5 more months. I am going crazy.
7. I want a hybrid car, but I love my car too much to give it up.
8. I hate wearing hats, but today I don't feel like washing my hair.
9. I have 3 tickets to see Jim Gaffigan on April 28th. I'll be sitting 10 rows behind Russell P. and his parents...probably by myself. At least I'll have my personal space.
10. My mom gained 13 pounds her first pregnacy, the most she gained with any pregnacy was 20 pounds. The average woman gains 25-35 pounds. I have no idea what I weighed before I got pregnant. From my guess, I think I have gained 3-5 pounds so far - 16 weeks. |
|
|
| Since no one (I know) does LJ anymore, I figured its time for one of these: |
[Mar. 31st, 2006|09:53 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  bored | ] |
Things about me
1. I've eaten pizza for the past 3 days, and guess what, tomorrow=pizza at my parents'. I am turning into Art.
2. I've always thought that I would die while giving birth. I still think this.
3. When I wake up in the middle of the night to go potty, I brush my teeth again before I go back to bed.
4. I thoroughly enjoy flipping off inanimate objects.
5. I've taken speech therapy classes.
6. When Harry Met Sally is a really good movie.
7. Everytime I think about eating beef, I picture going into a cattle ranch, grabbing a cow by the head and using one of those hook knives to slit its throat. So ya, I can't eat beef. And I didn't even stop eating beef for that kind of empathetic reason...maybe its a pregnant thing.
8. In elementary school, when kids used to talk about their churches or their religions, I had no idea what they were talking about.
9. Whenever I get bored or frustrated with my life, I dye or cut my hair. I'm jonesin' for a doing-on-of-those-things.
10. I go April 19th to get a video ultrasound done. I should be able to find out the sex of the baby then...and I should be able to get a copy of the tape. |
|
|
| Hey Journal |
[Mar. 11th, 2006|11:54 am] |
|
it POURED. wow, that wasn't meant to be that intense, it was a slip of the ring finger onto the caps lock key. i woke up excited. i took the dogs out back, or at least attempted to drag them out into the cold, and i just watched the end of the rain in my oversized robe...freezing my ass off-in Phoenix-in March. its like i woke up in a different city, in a different state. i wish. it was 10am, so way too early for the other two people in the house to be awake. i tried to go back to sleep, accomplishing an hour of warming up in two blankets with a 2 lb. Chihuahua curled up in my lower back...but no sleep. finally i decided i couldn't procrastinate the great weather any longer. i didn't even shower. that's a deal for me. i put on warmy warm clothes, got as cleaned up as anyone needs to be on a rainy afternoon, and made it as far as my living room couch. i really, really, really want to go out and do something...something...with someone who doesn't stress me. i don't think that exists here anymore. it sounds weird, and it goes a little off subject, but i swear every time my phone rings now, its just someone on the other end with some annoyance to spread onto me. there are no good calls anymore. and i am not responsible for other people's lives, please stop, its hard enough being responsible for my own and the other one on the way. well. now here i am, internet surfing, even though i know there is nothing here better than going outside. but im lonely and i guess im really just procrastinating how driving around alone in the rain will only just remind me. |
|
|
| HA! Caught you looking at LJ. |
[Feb. 14th, 2006|04:36 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | morose | ] |
Pregnacy: Week 9
Goodbye Sickness
Hello Depression
I still need stretch mark cream. This is important.
Ebay is my new baby furniture store.
I-don't-believe-in-god-parents=necessary? Really? Legally does it even mean anything?
I need a vacation. |
|
|
| Does anyone use LJ anymore? |
[Feb. 1st, 2006|12:51 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | Science in my Belly | ] |
So I'm 8 weeks pregnant.
So I'm 8 weeks pregnant and my birthday is next week.
Casey Moore's is out, other bars are out, remember, cause I'm pregnant. Sooo...
Peter Piper Pizza @ Arrowhead
Wednesday, Feb. 8th
7 or 8ish
Please come, or I'll probably never get to see you. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jan. 19th, 2006|09:36 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | bored | ] |
So, I am wedding dress shopping. This is hell. I hate these dresses. They weigh 10 pounds and make me feel like a cake.
I've narrowed it down to two. Oh, and my goals were casual, comfortable, dark colored and cheap.
Dress A is light weight, flowing. It comes in white or dark ivory, so not really as dark as I'd like. It doesn't have designs or anything on it make it fancy. It has a triangle top, so shows some cleavage and back. It may make me look hippie, but it isnt a bell, puffy ass dress. It is $400.
Dress B is heavy, but not the heaviest I've found. It is antique gold, great color. It has embroidered designs on top in a darker champagne color. It is a strapless strait across top, so flattering in the stomach line, but not anything to make me feel beautiful or anything. The bottom bells out some, but is plain satin. It is $200. <---serious sale, limited.
I found other, way more expensive dresses I liked too, but I took it down to these, reasonable ones. But what the hell do I choose? Help?
I can link to dress A, but I cant find anything like dress B, so ya, why bother. |
|
|
| News Alert: Splenda Found to Grow Second Tail on Test Gerbils |
[Dec. 28th, 2005|12:26 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | speak now or forever hold your | ] |
In Other News...
Matthew and Dana are to be wed...for real this time.
When: Maybe April, maybe later, depends on what happens with the Where: which we haven't started looking very much yet
Matt's Maid of Honor: Stacey
Dana's Best Man: Kris
Yes, Matt will be having a Bridal shower and Dana will be having a Bachler party.
Trying to figure out ring bearer, flower girl, etc situations still.
And no, Dana isn't pregnant.
Anyone who wants to help in the planning, decorating, work of it all, please let Dana and/or Matt know asap...the ball has started to roll. |
|
|
| Update |
[Dec. 7th, 2005|01:16 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | avoiding studying | ] |
Tonight after I do mediocre on my Nutrition final, Matt and I are off to LA.
Disneyland? Ah, so expensive at the expensive time of year.
Zoe's b-day. Need to shop still.
Vegan Restaurants a must.
Random shit, I dunno?
Hopefully Leah feeds the animals.
No work for 5 days. Sweeeet.
Next Friday, Dietary Holiday party...where? My house. Our company party is this Saturday. I'll be gone. I need a break from parties.
Kris' house is forever haunting me with all the work to be done. A couple paychecks from now it will be easier.
No more animals in this house. |
|
|
| Gerbil dies of mysterious causes, no others injured |
[Dec. 2nd, 2005|03:17 pm] |
|
Mr. Blonde has passed away on December 2nd, 2005 from apparent Gerbil inflicted injuries. She is survived by her two sisters of same age, My Cousin Walter and Artie. Mr. Blonde, originally named Mr. Pink, was not the friendliest of Gerbils, hence the name change, but she will be missed. She will have a midnight funeral, layed down to rest in the backyard, with a nice view of the pool. |
|
|
| Skip to the part about a Bottom Shelf Thanksgiving |
[Nov. 23rd, 2005|02:28 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  busy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Ben likes to Pown Noubs | ] |
Hi, remember me? I was one of your friends and then I disappeared.
Update: I work most days from 11-7:30. So you'd think I could totally go out at night and be able to sleep enough for work, right? Ya, I can. But lately its more like, work/home repair/moving-Kris' house repair/moving/eat/pass out/sleep/wake up/work/etc. For my two days off, I go to school one, usually cramming in my homework that afternoon before class, and the other is spent cleaning, shopping, etc. So, I talked to my boss and co-person with my position and changed my shedule. I will be working 7am-7pm three days a week, and 11-7:30 on Tuesdays. Three miraculous days off. So, besides the wacky X-mas schedule, I should have Saturday, Wednesday, and Thursday off. I should have school Thursdays and Saturdays starting this Spring semester.
So, point, I want a social life back. I want to see my friends, assuming they still are my friends.
(Sidenote: Matt's parents just dropped off flowers for Thanksgiving, so cute. My family, Matt's family, and My brother in law's family are all coming together at my new place for Thanksgiving. It's nuts. Pot luck style, but I did spent over $300 on decorations/food/etc. So dead.)
So, the first step, well, second, after the schedule change, is to have a Bottom Shelf Vegan Pot-Luck Thanksgiving. We've done it the last two years, and Kris should be in town...its perfect, right? Seriously, right? We need to warm the house or whatever anyway...Matt agrees.
So, Thursday, "The Wood House," which is my new place at 39th and Sweetwater, around 6pm? Food, drinking, hopefully the Bottom Shelf in the backyard? |
|
|
| Kill, Kill, Kill, Kill, Kill... |
[Oct. 25th, 2005|02:49 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | no gorram idea | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Kill the Poor | ] |
...its nice and quick and gets things done....
Work: Shit-Good-Crazy but not shit. Paycheck. The other day I learned how to use a Tilt Kettle and a Proofer. Umm, ya.
Home: Painting and cleaning the new place starting November 1st. U-haul move November 10th.
Recreation: Planning a LA trip in early December. Sorry about Disneyland, Kris.
Relationship: Freak that bitch.
My ipod was hidden away in my backpack for two months. I had the radio for two boring months. Hooray for the new Death Cab song that I cant listen to anymore. Now that I have busted the-magic-music-box out, I find myself in a different place then when I had put it away. (awkward sentence ahoy) Basically, two months ago I was Postal Service, The Shins, The Weakerthans, The Faint obsessed. Now I am Dresdon Dolls, The Clash, Dead Kennedys, Tilt obsessed. I still love the mellow, poetic indie kids (and The Faint, which isnt any of those things), but I just cant get into it right now. What the fuck happened?
There is country in my soul...
I really forget that I have a class. I go every week. I do great on the tests. But ya, non-existent at any other time. So that assignment due in a couple weeks, umm, ya. Procrastination or distraction?
I had nothing to say in this journal. I just felt like I hadn't posted in awhile. So I've been sitting here staring at the screen, caring more about itunes than writing anything meaningful. Sigh. Sorry. Or not. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Oct. 3rd, 2005|03:20 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  frustrated | ] |
Crasians.
Fucking Crasians.
Oh, and Serenity is now tied with High Fidelity for my favorite movie of all time. Really, it should be #1, but High Fidelity has been through some times with me; it earned its rank, so its hard to top. Even if you haven't seem Firefly (the TV show Sereity is based on), go see it, it stands on its own, I think. So good. I thought it would be good, but this was better than my greatest expectation. I am going again this week, Wednesday, maybe early, maybe night, if anyone is interested.
I need to start looking for another job. Not because I dont like this one, I do...and the shit loads of overtime are financially relieving. But I have a HR issue with my boss now and I think it is just going to be hell from now on. So I figure I better keep my options open and considering how long it took me to find this job, looking asap would be good.
I am Netflix's bitch.
In about a month, there will need to be a great shelf cleaning so Kris can sell his house. All help possible welcome and appreciated. Its going to be scary. Really scary.
This is all for now. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Sep. 7th, 2005|03:40 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | excited and scared | ] |
Moving 5 times in 1 year. Its totally possible. I am proof.
Finally have $ from having a real job. Going to blow it all in the process.
I miss seeing people. Anyone want to hang out soon? Or does anyone care? |
|
|
| Alas |
[Aug. 28th, 2005|07:54 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | sigh | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | thinking something about a yoke and a pilot | ] |
"Deleted Account
Deleted
This journal has been deleted. If you are -------, you have a period of 30 days from the deletion time to undelete the journal. After 30 days we will delete all content permanently from our servers."
Less importantly, but I am sure related: http://www.livejournal.com/users/cuntlaundry/
I think this means I need to get a real camera. At least not all of my pictures are gone. Sure, some, if not most, of them are silly and pointless, but some do mean a lot to me. My camera has been my only photo source for a long time, and some of these pictures are/were precious to me. But what does anything matter if you can't always have what you want? |
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| [ |
go |
| |
earlier |
] |
| |
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
leavesofgrass's journal
8
7.3
6.2
9.1